i was watching a girl writing today. she has beautiful long spidery fingers. they bend all crazy and she has pearly nails that glitter. when she pushes her glasses up from her nose she looks like a princess. i'd like to tell her this, but she would probably stare at me for a long time. she doesn't like me much...
my hands are small and awful. they do not dance, but curl, when i write. my fingers are short and they always have ink and paint on them. it's hard to play the guitar, i have to stretch them all crazy. and they are empty.
i'm drinking "paradise punch" out of a box. it doesn't feel like paradise. or anything at all. its going down my throat and i dont feel sand in my toes or ocean air or the sun. i feel the darkness of this room. bright eyes saying "sunrise, sunset.." over and over. feeling my own small shaky voice. i am so tired today. looking closely at everything today in a delirious stupor. looking you in the eyes as i pass by in the car. climbed in through my window again today. and fell asleep.
